The Widower Diary

Got my first real coverage. Wow. Do I have work to do. The reader had many questions and points which, at first, I thought “well it works THIS way and that should be obvious and fuck you!” but then I thought, hmmm, you know, that’s a good point. And that is too. I asked myself, what’s going on here really?

The answer is simple. Since The Family International still exists and still does bad things, I have felt that I need to get TW out there NOW. The problem of course has been that as a story, it just doesn’t work yet. And the difficulty with rewriting it is that I’m still so very close to it that it’s really hard to make the sometimes tough decisions.

In fact, I noticed with at least 2 other projects that have floated out there, when I’ve gotten notes or rejections, I haven’t felt this insane adrenaline surge, haven’t felt defensive, haven’t felt like shouting at the person giving me the notes or rejection, haven’t really cared at all.

I’m too fucking close.

So after thinking about the reader’s comments and the validity to them I thought, you know what? I need to take a break. I need to divest myself of responsibility. I may even need to let go of the idea of a movie. Because if I’m not able to do my job as a writer, none of it matters.

Thus I’ve decided that rather than burn through another draft in time for the Fade In Awards and anything else I might otherwise enter, I’ve decided I’m giving TW a rest. For how long, I don’t know. It might have to be a long, long time.

When I’d made this decision, I felt a good sense of relief. I thought, you know what, I have other things to write or rewrite, at least 1 of which is gonna be a lot easier to sell than TW. As soon as I gave myself permission to let TW go for now, I felt my shoulders fall. I think that’s a sign.

Time to give it a rest.

Grimm diary

I was very inspired recently by an idea (someone else’s) I realized I could use to write a feature somehow involving the Grimm Tales. This has been a goal of mine for over 10 years. At 1 point, I thought of doing a feature anthology (think 4 Rooms) with selected tales. I was ultimately unsatisfied with this idea as 1 I’d have to pick the 4 tales I wanted to use and 2 I generally think that anthology features are hard to do well (think 4 Rooms). Very disappointed, I eventually gave up on doing a Grimm feature.

Until now.

With this new idea, I quickly conceived of not only a fun, dark adventurous supernatural thriller, but I also realized it could use many of the elemnts that I’d wanted to use all along, along with some elements unrelated to the Grimm Tales that I’d wanted to use, and, AND it’s possibly the single most commercial story I’ve had to date. (Excluding Burning Atlanta).

I’m on page 7.

And to think that a month ago, I had no idea what next to write. I hope to have a draft of Grimm done by or before Halloween, but we’ll see. That’ll take some work.

The Widower Diary

Another pass and this time with a
I-liked-the-premise-BUT-it-didn’t-pan-out-as-I’d-hoped-it-would. No, I’m not quoting, but yes, she did say “pan out.” What the fuck is THAT supposed to mean? It didn’t end the way she wanted it to? She hated the whole thing? I asked a shorter, politer version of that. Then pitched other projects.

No response.

But this update is not all blue. Just today I got a message from a producer who said he liked it! What’s that you say?

He liked it.

Holy shit on a stick! You mean after what, 4 producers now, 3 contests, and lots of shame and frustration, 1 person liked it?

Yes.

Maybe I didn’t entirely fail as I had entirely suspected I had entirely done.

BtP diary

Got my 2nd pass. This time, she liked the character, but didn’t think she could sell it. What?? Isn’t that your JOB? And isn’t that exactly what Alan Ball’s agent told him when Alan pitched a little movie called American Beauty? That is what Alan Ball’s agent told him! Know how I know? Because I was there when Alan told the story. And yet we all know how that deal turned out, don’t we?

Ah well.

The nice thing about getting passed on with a project that I’m not that emotionally attached to is… I can let it go and don’t care! I mean sure, it’s a little frustrating that she responds to the character and STILL doesn’t think she can sell it, but since I’m not so entwined, I can do all that “next time” or “every no leads to a yes” etc bullshit.

Shriekfest

I didn’t win. But that’s fine. I didn’t expect to and I ended up meeting a couple of people who are interested in Burning Atlanta. So now for the calls and e-mails, etc.

Shriekfest

The 1st party was awesome! I even got interviewed by American Horrors! Not sure if/when the interview will be broadcast or on-line, but I’ll update when I find out.

The Widower Diary

Finally saw the Slamdance Top 100 Finalists. TW didn’t amke it. I clearly did something wrong. Very wrong.

Po’ ‘Lansky

Roman directed some of the most influential films of the last couple of decades. Roman won an Oscar for The Pianist. Roman freaked us all out with Rosemary’s Baby. Roman should be known as That Polish Guy Who Makes Cool Flicks.

But you drug and rape one minor…

This is 1 of those situations that pisses me off about history and about humans. In college, I heard a rumor that Geoffrey Chaucer very likely raped someone. I also heard that most scholars refused to believe this. You know, how could the father of Modern English ever do something like that?? Or I learned recently that Gandhi was a notorious racist. Or that Mother Teresa was really a cheating, swindling bitch. The concept that most peeople don’t seem to be able to grasp is the idea that 2 things are not necessarily mutually exclusive.

Maybe Chaucer did rape some chick. That’s not good, but has no direct effect on his influence over the English language.

Gandhi very likely wasn’t too kind on those of direct African ancestry. That’s not good either, but doesn’t mean that he didn’t also have a profound effect on his nation’s independence from England.

Mother Teresa I’m personally sick of. ‘Nough said.

The point is that just because you’ve done 1 good thing or 1 bad thing, or even a set of them, doesn’t exclude what else you’ve done.

So, Roman did rape a minor. And he also made some classic films. Neither is a substitute for the other. Of course the question now is, should he face the consequences of his actions?

Yes.

I know, I know. The girl, now woman, forgave him (and got a settlement for an undisclosed sum). But guess what? He still committed a heinous crime. And his victim forgiving him and being paid doesn’t change the fact that he committed a heinous crime. Are we to apply a radically different standard of justice on those who happened to cast Adrien Brody? I hope not. Because it’ll prove that, at least in the United States, the law doesn’t apply to you as long as you’re famous or award-winning enough.

I’m trying to be realistic. If Oprah set fire to a dozen orphanages after locking all the kids inside, filmed it, and, in the video, declared that she hated all orphans, especially the gay ones, let’s face it, the women in this country would forgive her. I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t even have to apologize on her show or build another school for girls in Africa. I mean, shit. Look what Mel got away with just for claiming to want to heal “heart wounds” in his interview with Diane Sawyer.

But we’re not talking about Oprah or Mel. We’re talking about a guy who did a terrible thing, was caught and convicted, then, like the slimy cowrad he is, ran away.

You fucked up, Roman. Welcome to Consequences.

(For more on how I feel about this, drop by my other, non-Atheist Asshole, site.)

Burning Atlanta

Yet another fucking company has requested it. Only for them, the first 10 pages and nothing else. Oh yeah, and this agency I’ve been talking with, have they given a shit about Fade In? About PAGE? About Writer’s Network? About Scriptapalooza?

No.

But I mention Shriekfest and BA and the guy’s eyes light right up. Thanks for fucking nothing, Audrey. It’s just so baffling to me. The high-concept supernatural thriller I pound out in near-record time is the one everyone wants. I am proud of aspects of it. I think I did a good job with death scenes, building tension, twists and all that, but I’d hate to be on a panel or interview x months from now when the moderator asks something like, “What’s Natalie’s motivation?” or “Where did the idea originate?” My answer will be something like,

“My wife came up with the idea after I whined about not having a commercial horror script. So we pretty much just wanted to make money.”

But I can’t say that because all the books and lectures and film schools and gurus tell you that you have to write what you’re PASSIOANTE about, not what you think will sell. And yet, no one’s fucking interested in what I’m PASSIONATE about. They’re interested in what will clearly make a good poster.

And to be clear, I don’t blame them. It’s not called Show Non-Profit. But what I don’t get is the gigantic disconnect between the theory of it and the practice. I saw this announcement that Warners is making a LEGO movie. The artist in me got all pissy.

“A feature based on LEGO?? What the fuck are they thinking??” But the practical side of me smacked the artist and said, “They’re thinking that millions upon millions of people have played with LEGOs and millions more have heard of them. Don’t you own LEGO Star Wars I and II?”
“Yes.”
“Well that’s millions of families who have millions of kids. Slap a cutesy story over a truck load of LEGOs and you have a truck load of profit.”
The artist sulks.

I swear when I get around to teaching this shit, I’m gonna say, “Kids, don’t write what you’re passionate about. No one cares. Write a high-concept, very easy to understand genre film with lots of action that can be sold in a one-sentence tagline. If you can cut the tagline down to only 1-3 words, that’s even better.”

What’s my fucking point? Oh yeah. Come to Shriekfest and the parties!!

BtP Diary

Jeannie loves it. Deborah was “blown away” (according to Jeannie). Jeannie’s man, Rich, who never reads anything and hates what he reads, loved it. So that’s good. We’re waiting for a guy to get back from New York to figure some things out. In the meantime, it’s all about the upcoming Shriekfest. And figuring out what the hell else to write.